Matthew and Me on Rhinocerous Ass and Dogma

3:58 PM me: I think we should test your rhinocerous theory out sometime. Where do you find rhinocerous ass?
3:59 PM Matthew: The Panera down the street serves it on a fantastic Foccacia bread with a shitake mushroom on top
4:00 PM me: Yes, but we're looking for rancid rhinocerous ass, not delectable rhinocerous ass.
4:01 PM Matthew: They actually offer rancid Rhinocerous salad. With feta crumbles
me: How is it?
Matthew: I always get the sandwich
4:02 PM me: You never try anything new.
Matthew: I can bring some to you in a to go bag with some bagels
me: I'm actually on a diet. I should probably only have the salad and feta.
4:06 PM Matthew: I'm so bored I'm looking at a google maps picture of Lake Pontetrain
4:09 PM me: I'm so bored I'm counting the number of dots on that little keyboard icon that indicates you're typing to see if it matches up with an actual keyboard.
36 minutes
4:46 PM me: "Christian Debt Services". Why specifically Christian? Is their debt different from mine?
4:49 PM Matthew: yes
their's is a spiritual debt
4:54 PM me: Hence purgatory, which is like God's prison colony.
4:55 PM Matthew: only for Catholics dude
you are not allowed
me: You think I want to live with you fucks in the heavenly equivalent of Australia? No thanks.
It's never cold in hell.

Testing Out Linkage

A blog within a blog.

The Return of Workday: This time it's fucking boring.

I was away from work for six days. Six glorious days of basking in the warm glow of my computer monitor as I battled devils in a game dating to the glory days of Sega, the Genesis. Oh, I also spent some time with my family and shit like that, but that pales in comparison to saving an entire world from devils. Ask any Evangelical and they'll tell you of the nefarious exploits of devils, demons and God.

Alas, my devil fighting has been put on hold so I might sit and shiver in the cold light of my work computer monitor. Work has entered what I like to call the Holiday Doldrums. I like to call it that because I am unoriginal. I'm a derivative of a copy of a forgery. Which is only slightly better than being one of the retards who uploaded their own version of "Dick in a Box" to youtube. They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. They are assholes.

To keep this from turning into too much of a ramble, I'll just say that I hope everyone who reads this had a merry Christmas (or Festivus, or whatever) and will have an exceedingly good New Year. If you need me, I'll be downloading porn.